How to avoid abusive relationships

how to avoid abusive relationships

Today, I’m going to be treating one of the more serious topics that I come across and that topic is how to avoid abusive relationships.

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This is a very important topic because I hear about it from women many times.  There are women who have endured one abusive relationship after the other and they don’t know what to do.  They wonder what they keep doing wrong.  This video is for them.  This video is going to help them avoid those kinds of relationships and make sure that their next relationship is the best one ever.


So, in order to avoid abusive relationships, one of the first things you should do when you’re considering dating a guy is to look out for the warning signs.  If a guy regularly, or not even regularly, if a guy beats his sister or he beats the house-help or he beats drivers, you have to take your time with that guy.  He might not be the person for you to go into a relationship with.  He might be showing you signs that he is violent.  He might be showing you signs that he’s an abusive kind of person.  Look at how a guy treats other people.  Look for the warning signs.  Usually, they are there.  Keep looking out for them.  Take note of them and avoid guys like that.


The next step to avoid abusive relationships is to learn from mistakes.  Learn from your own mistakes.  But even better than learning from your own mistakes is to learn from other people’s mistakes.  So if you have a friend, for example, who was dating a guy and the guy discouraged her from seeing her friends and her family and then she marries him and later you discover that he has been beating her.  Learn from that.  If you start dating a guy and he tries to stop you from seeing your friends and family, remember what happened to your friend and leave that guy.  He is not the one for you.  Learn from your friend’s mistakes.  Learn from other people’s mistakes.  You often read about things that happen to other women or see it on TV.  Look at what happened to those women and learn from them.  Don’t fall into the same mistakes that those women did.  Also, learn from your past mistakes.  If you dated a guy who, in public, would say “Shut up” or he would treat you in a way that showed he didn’t respect you and then he graduated to giving you slaps once in a while.  Learn from that mistake.  The sort of guy who would humiliate you in public is not the kind of person you want to go into a relationship with.  So the second tip for you today is to learn from mistakes.  Learn from other people’s mistakes and learn from your own mistakes.


Finally, you should take your time before you go into relationships.  Study the person well before you go into a relationship with him.  The longer you study a person, the longer it takes you before you fully enter a relationship, the longer it takes you before you sleep with a guy, the better your chances of knowing him.  Many people can pretend but most people cannot pretend for a long period of time.  Eventually, they will show their real personality and when they show their real personality, that’s when you can decide if you want to be in a relationship with them.


So, here are my three tips for you once again, if you want to avoid abusive relationships.  The first thing is to look out for the warning signs.  The second thing is to learn from mistakes – other people’s and yours.  The third thing is that you should take your time before getting into relationships.  That always helps.


If you’re in an abusive relationship today, please know that you always have a choice.  Please leave.  I know that leaving is not easy, particularly if you have children, but what you can do first of all is to take the decision in your mind that you want to leave.  Don’t tell your partner that you plan to leave him.  That is never a good idea.  Once you take the decision to leave, please speak to a professional counsellor or a professional therapist – someone who can help you, someone who is objective.  Please speak to such a person and tell the person what you’re going through and that you want to leave.  Such a person can help you.  Please do it today because it could save your life.


I run a Whatsapp group called The Magnetic Woman (TMW) for SINGLE women.  If you’re looking for a virtual community of single women who can make you laugh, give you support and share the experience of living as a single woman over 30, then TMW is the community for you.  The group is open for admission several times a year.  To be notified when next admissions begin, click here and fill the form you see.  See you in TMW! 🙂