I often say that finding love is a lot like sales – it’s a game of numbers. The more people you pitch to, the more likely you are to make a sale and the more people you go on dates with, the more likely you are to find love. When I say the more people you date, I don’t mean the more people you sleep with. You can go on dates with 10 people and not sleep with any of them.
Going on several dates helps you recognise the qualities you don’t want in your perfect partner and therefore helps you realise what you DO want. For example: you might go on a date with a guy who spends much of the time talking about himself and you realise that you want to be with someone who is interested in you and your mind. Or you could date a guy who takes phone calls from 3 different girls in the 1 hour you’re together making you realise that being with a guy who has several female ‘friends’ makes you feel insecure and that instead, you want someone who is focused on you. Think of dates as sales presentations because in a way, that’s what they are. You’re both ‘selling’ the best versions of yourself hoping the other person will ‘buy’ what you have to offer.
So, going on several dates when looking for love is a good thing but how do you even find people to go on those dates with in the first place? Good question. One way is to ask people out. We are in the 21st century after all. If you meet a guy that you think you would like to go on a date with, ask him! Some guys will be thrilled. It takes the burden of the possibility of rejection off them and makes their life easier. Other guys will be turned off. For them, the guy is the one supposed to do the asking and a girl asking a guy out is simply not ‘done’. If you do meet a guy who doesn’t take you up on your offer, take it that you’ve found out pretty quickly that he’s not the one for you and move on to the next person, just like you would if you were selling a physical product.
If the thought of asking a guy out makes you quake in your heels, there’s an easier way to get more dates and that is: decide that you want to go on more dates. It sounds simple and it is. Tell yourself that you will start going on more dates, imagine yourself being asked out more and it will happen. You will find yourself being asked out on so many more dates that you will wonder if someone made an announcement and told the world that you were single. You will find the process more fun if you first determine the kind of guy you want to be with and then decide you will go on more dates. Doing that will reduce the likelihood of your teenage brother’s friend, mechanic or other unsuitables asking you out.
Try it today. Determine the kind of person you want to be with then decide that you will go on more dates and let me know how it goes. Happy dating!
Learn how you can meet your perfect partner with my book, 7 Steps to Meeting the One. 7 Steps to Meeting the One is a short e-book that serves as a step-by-step guide on how to find the perfect partner for you. I found the ideal man for me following these steps and I believe you can too. You’ve got nothing to lose so try the book today. To buy 7 Steps to Meeting the One, click here.
7 Steps to Meeting the One costs N1,000 (one thousand naira only).